Update on the heat.

...we had a bunch of things to do today but didn't try to do too much. The kids and I went out in the backyard at 8:30 and within 5 minutes I was sweating. But, while they played, I put (back) together the doll house that L. got for Christmas. One side of it had blown over in the high winds and storms we have had the last few weeks and last week, Matthew decided to push the rest of it over and jump on top of it. Luckily the plastic is pretty resilient (and he is pretty lightweight!) and then I cut off the wood on our back fence gate which won't open because the ground isn't level there...it still won't open completely but it is better.

...then I remembered that the boys REALLY needed haircuts and in my current penny pinching-trying to pay for the adoption expenses mode, I am not going to spend $25 on haircuts. So, one at a time I put them outside and I cut their hair. I have gotten better at doing boy haircuts over the 5 years I have had them - though they have gotten less likely to just want a buzz cut. But, I have a very expensive pair of hair shears (LEFTY) and a pretty good buzzer and we got it done. I think both of them came out better than I have ever done them before. I am starting to be able to "thin" out the top part of Riley's and still have it lay flat. Matthew's cowlick is another thing but it looks cute!

...by the time I finished doing that it was lunch time...Addison ate an entire PB & J sandwich and then about 2 cups of watermelon chunks. Then she and Logan took a nap. They woke up in time for a little running under the hose and then we went to dinner with Wendy and Pat.

...we finished up our excursion with a trip to Target to buy Matthew another DS since Logan broke his other one.

...now we are home and I am trying not to move too much. Hope you all are keeping cool

It's not the heat...

...it's the humidity! Isn't that the old saying? well, it is definitely BOTH here in the mid-Atlantic this weekend. We had a wonderful, cool, relatively non-humid spring month of May but, this week has gotten progressively hotter. Today the forcast is for temps of 99 with heat index of 107 and tomorrow is supposed to be even hotter!

...so, what do you do with 4 kids under 7 when the recommendations are to stay inside because it is too DAM* hot?? It is a nightmare! Of course, it didn't start well...

...Riley woke at 6 am as usual...so, he went downstairs...Logan was content to sleep next to me until she heard him ask if he could have a popsicle (and me saying yes if he ate it over the table)...so, then I stay in bed till around 7 with various visitors (including a bob on the nose from a toy being thrown at me by my newest- I guess she wanted me to get up!)

...downstairs, meanwhile, the "boy who can't just eat one"...had found the brownies he and I had made last night and wasn't content to just make a mess downstairs and have the popsicle that I had told him he could have, but he had to (with Logan's help because she can't say no to sweets either) eat S*I*X (yes, you read it right!) brownies - leaving one (so I couldn't say they ate them all!)...I thought there was something funny when I saw empty baggies on the ground and didn't realize till I was making breakfast that the brownies were gone!

...so, needless to say, there is some tension in the house this morning. The two of them are banned from snacks all day. It will be a very tense day when the snack kids are kept from snacks all day.

...cabin fever is mostly described in cold weather but I bet it can happen in the heat too!

Joy!

Today, my newest daughter, attended daycare for the first time since her adoption. I have been off of work for over 2 months. In the next two weeks, I will work 2 days a week and then it will be FULL time. I knew this was coming, I have gone through it with my other 3 children as well, but somehow it was different this time.

When I first adopted my two older boys (in 2003), I read all of the information about child care options for adopted kids - how most people felt that large day-care centers were counter productive to attachment because it just put the child back into an institutional setting and that they wouldn't learn what it meant to be in a home or family. But, working in a large medical center that had a wonderful and caring on-site daycare center, I decided that having my new kids close was going to work for me. I made the committment (to myself) to never allow them to have 3 meals at the center and 3 months after I brought them home from Russia, I enrolled them. For my younger son, the transition was relatively easy. He was a laid back baby of 12 months who could weather any storm - as long as there was a bottle within reach.

For my older son (21 months at enrollment), it probably was one of the top 3 best decisions I have made for him. He was used to having a lot of children around. During my 3 month leave, he would regularly go to my back door and stare out at the neighbor children playing. His first English word was "shoes" (as in "lets put on some shoes" meaning we were going outside and he might have a chance to play with those other kids and not be only with me and his (at the time) pretty boring baby brother! On the day I brought him to the daycare center, he literally ran away from me to play with the other kids and the toys. Ultimately, it was the other kids who taught him what was the difference between a family and the center and he readily followed their lead.

When I brought home my older daughter 2 and 1/2 years later, I never had any doubts where she would go for daycare. She also was a young baby and adapted well - no doubt aided by the fact that her two very protective older brothers were also there for the first 6 months or so. A few months later, after my older son started school and needed a different center for after-care, I switched all of the kids to a program nearer to my house.

So now, I am home with daughter #2. Things are a little different. I spent a large portion of my allotted leave in Russia because the 10 day waiting period wasn't waived. My time at home with her has (literally) flown by. With 4 kids now, I have been seriously considering whether a nanny would be a better (or at least cheaper) option for daycare. In the back of my mind, I remember the recommendations from my reading 5 years ago. But something about having only one other person spending more hours a day with my child than I do ...something about that just seems like it would be counterproductive to me.

And honestly, her adjustment has seemed to be going better than I can even expect. This girl who was described to me by the orphanage director as "someone who will always have trouble with transitions" and who cried bitter tears each and everytime I visited her in Russia (19 separate visits of 1.5 - 2 hours each) and who, in Russia, was always trying to get me to leave and wanting to go back to her room - she shares more kisses and smiles and giggles than almost any other child I have encountered. She has displayed more signs of attachment in such a short period of time than I could even imagine. I truly believe that she was "waiting" for a mother to shower with love - and am blessed that I am that woman!

So, it is with great anxiety that I brought her to the daycare center this morning...Would she feel rejected? confused? angry? In the last month, she has been accompanying me to her older sister's class and has progressively become less timid and more interested in playing with the toys. We have been spending about 1/2 hour each morning and afternoon at the center. When we arrived this morning, her class was going outside. I went with her and put her into a swing (one of her favorite activities) and after about 10 minutes, I left.

Those tears which I haven't seen and sobs which I haven't heard for over a month were there as I said goodby...but her teacher picked her up and started to comfort her. Later, when I called, she was running around in the sprinkler! When I arrived to pick up the children, I walked into her room and...

WOW!!!! her eyes lit up, she ran to me and said "mama" and kissed my face about 20 times! I can honestly say that I have now seen pure JOY. I wish she had the words to express what she was feeling because I can only put my own spin on it. What I do know is that even though our "exclusive" time together has been shorter than I wish, we are definitely on track for a healthy and loving attachment - and I don't think that daycare could interfere with that!

Random monday musings...

...so, we are all sitting here waiting for the kids dentist appointment (need to leave in a few minutes) and the two boys decide to go outside. They ask if they can take Addison so I say okay...a few minutes later Logan goes outside and Riley opens the door for her (so I can stay sitting and working on my computer)...he shuts the door and then re-opens it with a big smile on his face and says to me..."mom, you get your own time!"...sometimes you want to kiss them...even a 5 year old can get that you need some time on your own (and I guess - for him - it is okay as long as it isn't my own time in my own bed!)

...what is your personality? a do it and get it over with kind of person? or a take your time and do it in small pieces so it doesn't hurt as much all at once? I'm sure you can guess what kind I am? not sure...okay...I am a single working woman with 4 kids under the age of 7...mmm...when I was an intern and resident, I always did the hardest rotations at the beginning of the year because I figured I could do anything for a month at a time...and today I am waiting to go to a dentist appointment...where all 3 kids are going to be seen. Yup, I am scheduled to take 3 kids aged 6, 6 3/4 and 3 to the dentist while carrying a newly adopted 2 year old with us. Crazy you say? yup. But, why not get the pain over all at once...I guess the only downside is how much pain we will cause the rest of the people at the office and the staff...oh well? its all about me...what about you?

Not much new...

...today was a better day than yesterday...not great but I still have a voice at the end of the day...we went to the pool (only took 20 minutes to get everyone dressed, everything packed and out the door)...I've been putting Addison into this infant float cuz I am a little worried about her stability - even in the baby pool. Today she wanted to get out so I let her and she did pretty well...fell a couple of times but was able to right herself.
...even Matthew has been swimming under water in the baby pool and tried his "wings" without a float in the big pool and Logan was swimming with her face in as well. Think this is the year that the 3 older ones will get it - especially with the swimming lessons at Tuckaway.